Today’s inspirational quote takes a slightly more somber perspective. Over the weekend I found out that I lost yet another military comrade to suicide. I hesitate to share how many that makes over my 25+ year career, because the numbers would truly scare you. And while I debated in whether or not to use this forum for such a heartbreaking message, I decided that it was too important not to share. Today’s quote comes from one of my favorite comedians and truly a creative genius who operated on a wholly different level than us mere mortals:
“Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind.” – Robin Williams
On August of 2014, Robin Williams lost his personal battle. The news was both staggering and devastating to his legions of fans. Many of us were caught off guard, asking how this could happen to someone who brought so much joy and laughter to us over three decades.
When these events strike closer to home with someone we had a close personal relationship with, we then start to speculate. What warning signs did we miss? What should we have seen? If only I had been more available…
The reasons why someone eventually reaches this point are numerous and span a wide spectrum of events and personal/professional challenges – some internal, other external. And even despite our closeness and intimate knowledge of some of those we lost, unfortunately our collective track record at identifying signs is not always as good as we would hope. According to the CDC, we lose 123 Americans per day to suicide. Another startling statistic highlights that for the last 10 years, 22 of those Americans (a staggering 18%) are current or previous military. These numbers have reached crisis levels, prompting awareness campaigns like the “IGY6!” movement (an acronym for “I got your six” – where the number six in military lingo represents “your back,” letting anyone who sees the patch or sticker know that they can freely approach that individual for help) and the “22 push-ups for 22 days” challenge to promote awareness for veteran suicide prevention. There are numerous others, reflecting amazing and selfless non-profit organizations whose main mission in life is to provide both national awareness and responsiveness to this devastating national emergency. In fact, the collective efforts of these groups have recently achieved a new three-digit emergency health crisis line similar to 911 with the newly signed Hannon Act. In this case, dialing 988, to make it easier for those at risk to immediately reach a certified responder.
The last 6 months, under varying COVID-related restrictions, we’ve found ourselves living in a world of unprecedented challenge. The results of which affect everyone in slightly different ways. When these “new normal” trials combine with some of our previously held inner turmoil’s, the resulting impact can be overwhelming. Regardless of where you might find yourself on this spectrum, I’d ask that you take a moment to please remember Robin William’s words above during your upcoming interpersonal interactions. The simple act of being receptive and more understanding may create the opportunity for someone to feel comfortable enough to share some concerns over the current battle they’re fighting. That non-judgmental and unconditional support may represent the initial step in finally being able to “find the light” in that proverbial dark tunnel. Hopefully that road to recovery will allow that individual to then share the story of how they were able to overcome what they were going through now, which may eventually become part of someone else’s survival guide in the future.
As I re-read what I wrote in the previous paragraphs, I realize that this topic may not be the most cheerful and inspiring of messages as you start your week. I’m also cognizant that based on the wide distribution of this blog, the odds suggest that there are several friends, colleagues, and family members reading these words who have intimate, personal experiences with these types of tragedies. And while I acknowledge that I am certainly not an expert in this area, I also have walked these dark roads in dealing with both colleague/subordinate events, as well as some of my own seemingly insurmountable challenges during dark periods of my life. My only hope is that I did the topic justice. I’ll leave you with this piece of advice from my mom: “Don’t forget that you’re human. It’s ok to have an occasional meltdown. Just don’t live there. Cry it out, reach out to someone who loves you, then refocus on where you’re headed.” We can all use a hand… Please be willing to frequently reach yours out.
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